569. Infected

Infected
The The
1986

Tracks
1. Infected
2. Out Of The Blue (Into The Fire)
3. Heartland
4. Angels Of Deception
5. Sweet Bird Of Truth
6. Slow Train To Dawn
7. Twilight Of A Champion
8. Mercy Beat

I find the name of this group to be embarrassing, like it was the exasperated idea for a band name after a night of heavy drug use. The ambiguous monster on the album cover points to the problem with this album. They were very angry at something; I am not really sure about what.

Possibly I am not well acquainted enough with the political climate of 1986 that this album was hellbent on commentating on, so it's not really the band's fault. On the other hand, I didn't find any of the songs compelling, which is definitely the band's fault (I'm an easy audience, I swear!).

Ugh, is this the last The The album on this List? Grammatically, that last sentence rubs me the wrong way and it's coloring my judgment.

RATING: 2/5

568. Master of Puppets

Master of Puppets
Metallica
1986

Tracks
1. Battery
2. Master Of Puppets
3. The Thing That Should Not Be
4. Welcome Home (Sanitarium)
5. Disposable Heroes
6. Leper Messiah
7. Orion
8. Damage Inc.

There are way too many heavy metal albums on this List. This genre has such a rigid style, that if you don't like heavy metal to begin with, you're just not going to enjoy any of these albums. Whereas, if you weren't a pop fan, I feel like the genre has a wide enough range that you could probably still identify and enjoy a few pop albums, even if you vehemently deny it to your head-banging friends. My theory as to why the List is so heavily saturated with this genre (which certainly doesn't possess mass appeal) is that the quality of metal is fairly consistent throughout the years (which is definitely not the case with other genres), so it is easy to find a decent metal album to fill in some of these musically-desolate years, like 1986. 

Which is my long winded way of saying: I hate Metallica.

Boring, repetitive, and worst of all, you can tell they take themselves much too seriously. I think they just got famous because they came up with a cool band name.  Unfortunately, this is the first of many Metallica albums on this List. 


RATING: 2/5

567. Licensed to Ill

Licensed to Ill
Beastie Boys
1986

Tracks
1. Rhymin & Stealin
2. The New Style
3. She's Crafty
4. Posse In Effect
5. Slow Ride
6. Girls
7. (You Gotta ) Fight For Your Right (To Party)
8. No Sleep Till Brooklyn
9. Paul Revere
10. Hold It Now, Hit It
11. Brass Monkey
12. Slow And Low
13. Time To Get Ill

I recently participated in a bar trivia night. A question was posed about a musical trio. One guy said the Beastie Boys, everybody else thought it was Rush, and I bleated feebly that I had no fucking idea. Anyway, we went with Rush, but the answer was Beastie Boys. Maybe if I had listened to this album before I could have lent more support to Will. Sorry, Will.

It's refreshing to listen to an album on this List that doesn't take itself quite so seriously. I am a huge Hamilton fan, so it was interesting to listen to this album; you can see its influence clearly in tracks like "Aaron Burr Sir" and "Winter's Ball." 

Anyway, a fun, silly album that was a welcome change of pace.

RATING: 4/5

566. Planet Rock

Planet Rock
Afrika Bambaataa and the Soul Sonic Force
1986

Tracks
1. Planet Rock
2. Looking for the Perfect Beat
3. Renegades of Funk
4. Frantic Situation
5. Who You Funkin' With?
6. Go Go Pop
7. They Made a Mistake

The Listmakers have once again lied to us, by saying that this List does not contain any compilation albums. I'm far too accustomed to the Listmakers' abuses to feel this blow too heavily.

...

Okay, it's possible I'm being a touch dramatic, because this wasn't actually that bad.

Old school hip hop isn't my genre of choice, but I did enjoy "Who You Funkin' With?" (even if they did steal my catchphrase). Sounds pretty outdated at this point, but still a fun listen.

RATING: 3/5

565. Blood and Chocolate

Blood and Chocolate
Elvis Costello and the Attractions
1986

Tracks
1. Uncomplicated
2. I Hope You're Happy Now
3. Tokyo Storm Warning
4. Home Is Anywhere You Hang Your Head
5. I Want You
6. Honey Are You Straight Or Are You Blind
7. Blue Chair
8. Battered Old Bird
9. Crimes Of Paris
10. Poor Napoleon
11. Next Time Round

Scritti Politti might have had me wondering why I even decided to undertake this project in the first place, but then Elvis Costello comes along and reminds me. Not that I was familiar with his work before, but it becomes extra special when you are hear it in the midst of all the other shit that was coming out at the same time.

This is an angrier Elvis than his previous albums, but thankfully, it is never cringey. His bitterness comes naturally, which is a perk for us, even if it doesn't bode well for his mental health. 

It's rare to listen to an artist this versatile, so this album was a real treat. And like a bear stuffing her fat face before winter, I must store up on good music. Metallica is coming up.

RATING: 5/5

564. Cupid and Psyche '85

Cupid and Psyche '85
Scritti Politti
1985

Tracks
1. Word Girl
2. Small Talk
3. Absolute
4. Little Knowledge
5. Don't Work That Hard
6. Perfect Way
7. Lover To Fall
8. Wood Beez (Pray Like Aretha Franklin)
9. Hypnotize

This was a very generic 80s pop album. It is likely so generic because it was influential and I've heard a lot of shitty imitations of it. But it hasn't aged well, and bands like Aha have, so I feel justified in giving this a low rating.

Also, what an annoying name for a band. Our suffering was worth it, though, because Elvis Costello is next!

RATING: 2/5

563. Don't Stand Me Down

Don't Stand Me Down
Dexy's Midnight Runners
1985

Tracks
1. Kevin Rowland's 13th Time
2. Occasional Flicker
3. This is What She's Like
4. My National Pride (Formerly Knowledge of Beauty)
5. One of Those Things
6. Reminisce (part 2)
7. I Love You (Listen to This)
8. Waltz

If you love Dexy's Midnight Runners, you will love this album. Probably an obvious point, but who wouldn't want to listen to their favorite band have a casual jam session that is interspersed with chit chat and banter? For the rest of us, who are fairly indifferent to this band, it is merely okay.

This album has two very good tracks: "This is What She's Like" and "My National Pride." "My National Pride" wasn't even in the original version, but it was released later as part of a director's cut. Of course, because self indulgence is a timeless vice, each song on this album is roughly ten minutes long. Unnecessary, and not at all shocking that this was a commercial flop.

But I did enjoy parts of it, and here on this blog we take what we can get. It's our official slogan.

RATING: 3/5