356. Destroyer

Destroyer
Kiss
1976

Tracks
1. Detroit Rock City 
2. King Of The Night Time World 
3. God Of Thunder 
4. Great Expectations 
5. Flaming Youth 
6. Sweet Pain 
7. Shout It Out Loud 
8. Beth 
9. Do You Love Me
10. Untitled

So you know how in a romantic comedy the woman will be convinced throughout the film that a guy is a shallow jerk?  Then she sees him play with his niece/nephew and she realizes that the jerk thing is just an act and that he is actually a really sweet guy?  That is how I felt after listening to this album.

This album starts off with completely useless sound effects.  Why would you want to start your album with sounds of what seems like a busy restaurant?  I fail to see the relevance.  Anyway, we then continue through some pretty generic hard rock tracks that sounded vaguely familiar.  This could be because all those songs tend to sound the same to me (I know that is pretty genre-ist) or because Kiss is still referenced a lot in pop culture.  For example:

Then we actually hit a pretty beautiful song called "Beth".  Finally, I recognized that Gene Simmons actually some real talent beyond dressing up in stupid outfits (which I accomplished all through high school and never became famous for) and yelling into a microphone.  It is a wonderful song and one that I highly recommend listening to.

However, after that track we get back to more generic rock music that failed to impress me. In other words, Gene put down the baby and made a terrible penis joke.  Is anyone else following this analogy?  This might only make sense to my romantic comedy obsessed mind.

RATING: 3/5

Beth:

355. Arrival

Arrival
ABBA
1976

Tracks
1. When I Kissed The Teacher 
2. Dancing Queen 
3. My Love My Life 
4. Dum Dum Diddle 
5. Knowing Me Knowing You 
6. Money Money Money 
7. That's Me 
8. Why Did It Have To Be Me 
9. Tiger 
10. Arrival

I woke up a couple of days ago and immediately scratched my cornea.  I really had no reason for doing this except perhaps my brain wanted to test a new form of alarm clock that did not prove to be successful.  In any case, I haven't been able to see very well, which is the perfect chance to catch up on some albums.  This one will either have you cheering or searching for a shotgun, depending on your opinion of pop disco.

My experience with ABBA had been strictly through movies, like Mamma Mia! and Muriel's Wedding. They are both slightly obnoxious films, but I never faulted ABBA for this.  However, after listening to this album, I suddenly want to point fingers.

I think we are all familiar with "Dancing Queen" which is fun the first time you listen to it and unbearable the million other times that you will be forced to listen to it.  I also knew the song "Money Money Money" which is terrible even if it is your first time hearing it.

I was completely ready to write this album off when the song "Why Did It Have To Be Me" came on.  It was catchy as hell and actually included some male singers which was refreshing for the album.  Of course, after that we were back to the somewhat creepy song "Tiger" that had me looking behind my shoulder.

So there are a couple good songs but otherwise the band is always teetering on the brink of obnoxiousness.  I am not going to fault them for their lyrics since they are Swedish; I can barely put a sentence together in any other language.  Actually, sometimes I have trouble putting a sentence together in English, but that is usually in front of a hot guy.

RATING: 3/5

Trailer for Mamma Mia!  Pierce Brosnan sings.  Run, run as fast as you can.

354. Hotel California

Hotel California
Eagles
1976

Tracks
1. Hotel California 
2. New Kid In Town 
3. Life In The Fast Lane 
4. Wasted Time 
5. Wasted Time (reprise)
6. Victim Of Love 
7. Pretty Maids All In A Row 
8. Try And Love Again 
9. Last Resort

This is another album that is considered complete crap by the intellectual music crowd so, of course, I knew I would like it.  Still, I was a bit disappointed with this one, which possibly means I am growing.  Or it could mean I am crossing over to dark side, depending on how you look at it.

I think everyone has heard the song "Hotel California", but I think the definite stand out track was "Wasted Time".  The lyrics are actually quite beautiful; take a look:

"You never thought you'd be alone this far down the line
And I know what's been on your mind
You're afraid it's all been wasted time

The autumn leaves have got you thinking about the first time that you fell
You didn't love the boy too much, no, no, you just loved the boy too well,
Farewell
So you live from day to day, and you dream about tomorrow, oh.
And the hours go by like minutes and the shadows come to stay
So you take a little something to make them go away
And I could have done so many things, baby
If I could only stop my mind from wondrin' what
I left behind and from worrying 'bout this wasted time"

Of course, "Hotel California" definitely is memorable as it is comment on the life on the West Coast at the time.  Of course, the stance that people in the music industry are greedy and fame whores isn't exactly shocking or even daring, but it is still a good song.

However, I completely understand the complaints that might arise from this album.  While the songs are catchy, by the time the album is over you definitely want it to end.  Besides the two songs I mentioned, the rest is just kind of a blur of generic rock music.

Still a fun listen though and it is not as shitty as it is made out to be.

RATING: 4/5

353. Boston

Boston
Boston
1976

Tracks
1. More Than A Feeling
2. Peace Of Mind
3. Foreplay (Long Time)
4. Rock 'n' Roll Band
5. Smokin'
6. Hitch A Ride
7. Something About You
8. Let Me Take You Home Tonight

I immediately fell in love with this album as soon as the music started.  I went right to Google to find more music like this and discovered that this album is either considered a guilty pleasure or complete crap.  Why does this always happen?  So I guess if you want to be a sophisticated music fan, say you like the opposite of whatever love.  But if you want to actually have some fun, stick with mine shitty tastes!

Apparently, "More Than A Feeling" is the major hit off this album and is even on Guitar Hero.  I actually thought that every song was just as catchy as that one.  Granted, I didn't pay too much attention to the lyrics but the music is so fun that it doesn't really matter.

Sorry for the short review but I have to write a speech and am entering meltdown territory.  So a great album, like Queen without the pretentiousness.

RATING: 5/5

More Than A Feeling:

352. Hejira

Hejira
Joni Mitchell
1976

Tracks
1. Coyote
2. Amelia
3. Furry Sings The Blues
4. Strange Boy
5. Hejira
6. Song For Sharon
7. Black Crow
8. Blue Motel Room
9. Refuge Of The Roads

I am a huge fan of Joni Mitchell and was quite excited to listen to this album, which is comprised completely of songs I had never heard of.  But Joni, Joni, Joni...this was not as good as it could have been.

I read some comments that people had posted on YouTube under these songs.  One person said that every line of "Song For Sharon" explored the journey of being a woman.  Hmmmm...I don't know about that.  I am a woman and I have never played bingo in Staten Island.  I suppose I could relate to her complaining about the pressure of having children but other than that the lyrics were a miss for me.

Joni's writing style always seemed like more of a train of thought that actual lyrics.  While this is frequently charming, I felt like she missed her mark this time around.  The songs also seemed to all have identical melodies (although I thoroughly enjoyed "Blue Motel Room") and I felt myself wanting her to take more risks.

Of course, it is Joni so the singing is beautiful and it is easy to listen to.  Still, she has set the bar high before and I was disappointed.

RATING: 3/5

"Blue Motel Room":

351. Station to Station

Station to Station
David Bowie
1976

Tracks
1. Station To Station 
2. Golden Years 
3. Word On A Wing 
4. TVC 15 
5. Stay 
6. Wild Is The Wind

Apparently, David Bowie could not remember making this album after it was done since he was so high on cocaine.  He would have to be a musical genius to pull off a masterpiece in that state.  Unfortunately, I don't feel that way about old Bowie.

I am not saying this album is bad, but it is certainly not as good as what you would expect from such a legend.  Lyrically, the album has its high points.  For example:

Wonder who wonder who
wonder when
Have you sought fortune evasive and shy?
Drink to the men who protect you and I
Drink drink drain your glass
raise your glass high

However, instrumentally there is nothing very original here and no song stuck in my head for long.  Wikipedia lists the album as soulful but to me, it almost sounded mechanical.

Sorry for the rather sucky review but I have a ton of work to do before my Golden Globes party tonight (aka being in my pajamas on the couch with tons of sweets).

RATING: 2/5

350. The Modern Lovers

The Modern Lovers
The Modern Lovers
1976

Tracks
1. Roadrunner
2. Astral Plane
3. Old World
4. Pablo Picasso
5. I'm Straight
6. Dignified and Old
7. She Cracked
8. Hospital
9. Someone I Care About
10. Girl Friend
11. Modern World
12. Government Center

Happy New Year everyone!  This year's goal is to get to 500 by the end of the year.  We will see how we do.  In the meantime, happy 350th!  I get extremely excited about minor milestones, don't mind me.

This is a strange album, in that it sounds like something that could either have come out in 1966 or, excluding a few of the tracks, 2005.  Actually, this album was created in 1973 but wasn't released until 1976.  On a side note, the trick to be a good writer is to include as many dates as you can into a couple sentence to confuse everyone.

Here a sample stanza from the song Pablo Picasso:

Well some people try to pick up girls

And get called assholes

This never happened to Pablo Picasso

He could walk down your street

And girls could not resist his stare and

So Pablo Picasso was never called an asshole

Um, what?  Is this a common belief that no one thought Picasso was an asshole?  I highly doubt it since most artists are.  It is just so completely random that it baffles me.  And have you ever seen Picasso?  I am pretty sure women could resist him.

All right, so maybe I don't really get the lyrics.  It was still a fun album, with catchy songs.  The lead singer reminded me of Roger Daltry. So another discovery from The List that I never would have heard of otherwise.

RATING: 4/5

Available on YouTube: