531. Colour By Numbers

Colour By Numbers
The Culture Club
1983

Tracks
1. Karma Chameleon 
2. It's A Miracle 
3. Black Money 
4. Changing Every Day 
5. That's The Way (I'm Only Trying To Help You) 
6. Church Of The Poison Mind 
7. Miss Me Blind 
8. Mister Man 
9. Stormkeeper 
10. Victims

This is the final album of 1983 and what a way to go. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a five star album on our...ears. Ahem. Is this thing on?

This album is absolutely brilliant, starting from the opening track. You will be hard pressed to get some of these melodies out of your head, particularly "Karma Chameleon" and "Church of the Poison Mind." It just doesn't get better than the Culture Club; I wish more people would talk about them. 

Anyway, say goodbye to 1983, which was truly the best (this and The Blue Nile) and the worst (Meat Puppets) of times. Happy holidays!

RATING: 5/5

530. Meat Puppets II

Meat Puppets II
Meat Puppets
1983

Tracks
1. Split Myself in Two
2. Magic Toy Missing
3. Lost
4. Plateau
5. Aurora Borealis
6. We're Here
7. Climbing
8. New Gods
9. Oh, Me
10. Lake of Fire
11. I'm a Mindless Idiot
12. Whistling Song

Usually I would start with my traditional apology for waiting so long between posts but this is a country punk album. Yes, you read that correctly. For that reason, I don't think an explanation is necessary as to why I would put off listening to this.

Actually, it wasn't quite as bad as I was expecting. It was all over the place but what it lacked in cohesion it made up for in pure enthusiasm. And hey, at least it was original.

Of course, any band named the "Meat Puppets" is never going to be a favorite of mine. Still worth a listen.

RATING: 3/5

529. Synchronicity

Synchronicity
The Police
1983

Tracks
1. Synchronicity I
2. Walking In Your Footsteps
3. O My God
4. Mother
5. Miss Gradenko
6. Synchronicity II
7. Every Breath You Take
8. King Of Pain
9. Wrapped Around Your Finger
10. Tea In The Sahara

Ah, last album was U2 and now The Police?  This is wonderful!  What did I do to des-oh wait, the next album is Meat Puppets.  That's more like it.

Well, let's enjoy our four star album before the dark times.  This was a great album and you have probably heard at least one of these songs even if you aren't into The Police.  I think Sting tends to show off sometimes; maybe he wants us to think he is Bono.  But he is perfect here.

Might be the last good album of 1983.  So check it out!

RATING: 4/5

528. War

War
U2
1983

Tracks
1. Sunday Bloody Sunday 
2. Seconds 
3. New Year's Day 
4. Like A Song... 
5. Drowning Man 
6. The Refugee 
7. Two Hearts Beat As One 
8. Red Light 
9. Surrender 
10. 40

So we can all probably agree that Bono is generally pretty annoying.  That being said at least he has good intentions and most famous people are dicks anyway.  That is my cheerful introduction to War, the first five star album we have had in a long time!

I feel like we often get albums that are completely devoid of meaning but catchy as hell, or albums that are a total slog to get through, but carry some important message.  Rarely do we get the best of both worlds.  Here we get some great political songs that I really enjoyed listening to.  The entire album has a very cohesive sound and you can see why U2 is so influential over the years.

A wonderful album and we get the Police next!  Things are turning around for old Amanda!

RATING: 5/5

527. Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)

Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)
Eurythmics
1983

Tracks
1. Love Is a Stranger 
2. I've Got an Angel 
3. Wrap It Up 
4. I Could Give You (A Mirror) 
5. Walk 
6. Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) 
7. Jennifer 
8. This Is the House 
9. Somebody Told Me 
10. This City Never Sleeps

Well I have been looking for an album to break the "meh" streak we have been having lately.  These albums aren't bad, but I keep waiting to be swept off my feet.  Once again, this was a decent album, but my socks are still firmly in place.

We've probably all heard "Sweet Dreams," although I would have never been able to name the band that sang it.  It's been awhile since I was greatly impressed by vocals, but I loved the sound of this album.  It's like Annie Lennox was angry and friendly sounding at the same time.  It was an odd combination, but it worked.

However, it did get a bit redundant by the end and I was ready for it to be over.  Next up, U2! 

RATING: 3/5

526. Eliminator

Eliminator
ZZ Top
1983

Tracks
1. Gimme All Your Lovin' 
2. Got Me Under Pressure 
3. Sharp Dressed Man 
4. I Need You Tonight 
5. I Got The Six
6. Legs 
7. Thug 
8. TV Dinners 
9. Dirty Dog 
10. If I Could Only Flag Her Down 
11. Bad Girl

As a 22 year old woman, I think I would be quite an exceptional person if I got enjoyment out of this.  Now, I did like Tres Hombres, but unfortunately, this album didn't hold the same appeal for me.  

Did they get cheesier?  I think the 80s were a bad influence on them.  I guess there has always been an element of cheese in ZZ Top, but it was decidedly less charming this go-round.

Anyway, another just okay album.  I'm looking forward to getting blown away by something soon.

RATING: 3/5

525. Porcupine

Porcupine
Echo and the Bunnymen
1983

Tracks
1. The Cutter
2. The Back Of Love
3. My White Devil
4. Clay
5. Porcupine
6. Heads Will Roll 
7. Ripeness
8. Higher Hell
9. Gods Will Be Gods
10. In Bluer Skies

This album started off great; unfortunately, it peaked too early.  Maybe "The Cutter" should have been a track in the middle; then the entire album wouldn't have felt like a downhill slog.

I am being much too harsh, but you all know by now how much I enjoy my jabs and semicolons.  This was actually a pretty decent album.  I suppose my expectations were a bit too high after "Crocodiles" and I just wanted this one to live up to its predecessor.  "The Cutter" did.  The rest...well...

The rest was okay and I do really like the vocals (don't ask me why).  But I felt like the lyrics were reaching for something that wasn't there.  "Gods Will Be Gods," for instance, felt way too lofty for this band to pull off.  This isn't their last album on the List though and I can truthfully say I look forward to the next one.

RATING: 4/5

524. Hearts and Bones

Hearts and Bones
Paul Simon
1983

Tracks
1. Allergies 
2. Hearts and Bones 
3. When Numbers Get Serious 
4. Think Too Much 
5. Song About the Moon 
6. Think Too Much 
7. Train in the Distance 
8. Rene and Georgette Magritte With Their Dog After the War
9. Cars Are Cars
10. Late Great Johnny Ace

What a mixed bag this was.  On the one hand, you have some decent songs like "Allergies" and "Hearts and Bones." And then you have songs like "Cars Are Cars" that make me doubt whether Simon should have dropped his other half.  Apparently, Garfunkel worked of the songs with Simon. My guess is he heard the Car song and decided to distance himself from the project.

It's a strange choice for the List, as I think this album is considered the lowest point of Simon's career.  I am convinced that the Listmakers periodically like to torture us with bad music so their other picks seem better.  That would explain so much.

RATING: 3/5

523. She's So Unusual

She's So Unusual
Cyndi Lauper
1983

Tracks
1. Money Changes Everything
2. Girls Just Wanna Have Fun
3. When You Were Mine
4. Time After Time
5. She Bop
6. All Through The Night
7. Witness
8. I'll Kiss You
9. He's So Unusual
10. Yeah Yeah

And now, for something completely different.  An album that people have actually heard of.

So most of the songs were familiar to the point of tired, but I didn't mind.  Anytime I hear "Time After Time" I think of Romy and Michele and what could be wrong with that?  It was interesting to hear this album; we tend to think of female pop as being defined by Madonna, but Lauper nails it before anyone else.  I probably could have done without "He's So Unusual" though.  That was just weird.

A great album that really holds up and I always appreciate female inclusion on the List.

RATING: 4/5

522. Back to Mystery City

Back to Mystery City
Hanoi Rocks
1983

Tracks
1. Strange Boys Play Weird Openings
2. Mental Beat
3. Until I Get You
4. Lick Summer Lover
5. Ice Cream Summer
6. Malibu Beach Nightmare
7. Tooting Bec Wreck
8. Sailing Down The Years
9. Beating Gets Faster
10. Back To Mystery City

As usual, I will begin my post by apologizing for the gaps in posting.  I have had some medical problems lately that have been weighing on my mind and unfortunately, Hanoi Rocks isn't the distraction I've needed.

I didn't know glam punk even existed.  Isn't the point of punk to be coarse and gritty? I always thought the lack of polish was the appeal.  Consequently, I thought this album fell flat.  Of course, my bar is pretty low after doing this blog for five years (sorry List) so it wasn't entirely unpleasant.  Still, I don't think this was worth listening to.

Up next: Cyndi Lauper.  A woman!  Quite unusual in these parts.

RATING: 3/5

521. Walk Across the Rooftops

Walk Across the Rooftops
The Blue Nile
1983

Tracks
1. Walk Across The Rooftops 
2. Tinseltown In The Rain 
3. From Rags To Riches 
4. Stay 
5. Easter Parade 
6. Heatwave 
7. Automobile Noise

I haven't given out a five star rating in a long time.  In fact, I think the last one went to the Jam in 1980 for Sound Affects. Wow, that actually bums me out.  Maybe I need to be less stingy.

In any case, this was brilliant.  The songs were hauntingly beautiful; without invoking Nico level sadness, they made me feel, man.  I guess the best way I can describe it is peaceful.  It wasn't unbearably morose or relentlessly cheerful and in that way, it felt..whole.

Anyway, here's hoping more five star albums are on the horizon.  Did I really not give Elvis Costello five stars??  I have problems.

RATING: 5/5

520. Swordfishtrombones

Swordfishtrombones
Tom Waits
1983

Tracks
1. Underground 
2. Shore Leave 
3. Dave The Butcher 
4. Johnsburg, Illinois 
5. 16 Shells From A 30.6 
6. Town With No Cheer 
7. In The Neighbourhood 
8. Just Another Sucker On The Vine 
9. Frank's Wild Years 
10. Swordfishtrombone 
11. Down, Down, Down 
12. Soldier's Things 
13. Gin Soaked Boy 
14. Trouble Braids 
15. Rainbirds

Well that was a lot odder than I expected.  Many moons ago I reviewed Heart Attack and Vine and, understandably, fell in love with it.  By 1983, Waits had left Asylum for Island Records; perhaps the new label allowed him to do whatever he wanted for the first time.  This album is a lot more experimental than his previous work; I almost didn't recognize him.

I can't say I was 100% behind all of his creative decisions.  I wish he had stuck to more conventional instruments (even Waits can't make bagpipes work).  However, I did like how eclectic this album was, while still remaining strangely coherent.

RATING: 3/5

519. Soul Mining

Soul Mining
The The
1983

Tracks
1. I've Been Waiting for Tomorrow (All My Life)
2. This is the Day
3. The Sinking Feeling
4. Uncertain Smile
5. The Twilight Hour
6. Soul Mining
7. Giant
8. Perfect

Once again, I was greatly confused by which version to listen to, as this album has approximately a thousand rereleases (or you know...five).  I ended up choosing US 1983 version, which is fortunate, as "Perfect" was easily the best song on this album (and wasn't included in the UK release).

This album is somewhat dated, although in the best way possible.  I feel like it really captures the British spirit at the time (this is just a conjecture though; I wasn't there).  Overall, a great album and I hope The The is featured more on this List.  Sorry for making fun of your name earlier.
  
RATING: 4/5

518. Murmur

Murmur
R.E.M.
1983

Tracks
1. Radio Free Europe
2. Pilgrimage
3. Laughing 
4. Talk About the Passion
5. Moral Kiosk 
6. Perfect Circle
7. Catapult
8. Sitting Still 
9. 9-9 
10. Shaking Through 
11. We Walk 
12. West of the Fields

This is another album that's quality is slightly diluted over time; I am sure this would have sounded quite original at the time.  As is, the experience is rather generic now, although "Radio Free Europe" still stands out as a great song.

Of course, I am pretty sure the songwriters admitted that "Radio Free Europe," at least, was mostly babbling and wasn't intended to make any sense at all.  I tend to prize lyrical quality above all else, but I guess when you have a good enough beat it doesn't matter (I Am The Walrus, anyone?).

Next up: The The.  I am already wowed by this band's creativity.

RATING: 3/5

517. Pyromania

Pyromania
Def Leppard
1983

Tracks
1. Rock Rock (Till You Drop)
2. Photograph 
3. Stagefright 
4. Too Late For Love 
5. Die Hard The Hunter 
6. Foolin' 
7. Rock Of Ages
8. Comin' Under Fire 
9. Action Not Words 
10. Billy's Got A Gun

Well, it appears that my icon will remain as a snail, as I continue to move at that pace.  It's been a rough month and I didn't think Def Leppard would be much help.  My mood has been much more Nico/Fiona Apple.

That's not to say that this isn't a good album; it had a distinct Aerosmith/AC/DC vibe with slightly more intelligent lyrics and slightly less memorable hooks.  Some of the lyrics were downright sweet, although that adjective might make Def Leppard fans cringe.  Actually, ignore that.  I just googled this album and apparently Taylor Swift did a cover of "Photograph" with Def Leppard.  So maybe any pretensions their fans have are gone by now.

So a decent album and a vast improvement from Duck Rock.

RATING: 3/5

516. Duck Rock

Duck Rock
Malcolm McLaren
1983

Tracks
1. Obatala
2. Buffalo Gals
3. Double Dutch
4. Merengue
5. Punk It Up
6. Legba
7. Jive My Baby
8. Song For Chango
9. Soweto
10. World's Famous
11. Duck For The Oyster

Having visited Malcolm McLaren's grave last year, I came into this album with a certain kind of softness; I was ready to be kind.  But wow, this was a rough one.

Like most people, I have only known Malcolm McLaren through his work with the Sex Pistols and hadn't heard his own music.  This album is styled like a radio show and...what can I say? It was odd, jarring, and not all rhythmic.  I suppose that isn't the point of his music.  The point is...well, I've never understood what the point is, which is probably obvious.

Duck Stab, Duck Rock...can we agree to stay away from the mallards please?

RATING: 2/5

515. Violent Femmes

Violent Femmes
Violent Femmes
1982

Tracks
1. Blister in the Sun
2. Kiss Off
3. Please Do Not Go
4. Add It Up
5. Confessions
6. Prove My Love
7. Promise
8. To The Kill
9. Gone Daddy Gone
10. Good Feeling

Once again, I am confined to bed after an ankle surgery.  Maybe I will binge myself on albums like I did with movies last time.  I'm not sure that the solution to excruciating pain is heavy metal music, but I think we are safe for now with the Violent Femmes.

Based on the name of the band, I was kind of hoping this was some Camp Cope-esque angry female group.  Although I was initially disappointed that the vocalist wasn't female, I quickly warmed up to Gordon Gano's voice.  It sounded very 70s to me, which was a fun throwback.

I hope their next album is on The List. Now if you'll excuse, I need to consume some drugs.

RATING: 4/5

514. Rio

Rio
Duran Duran
1982

Tracks
1. Rio
2. My Own Way
3. Lonely In Your Nightmare
4. Hungry Like The Wolf
5. Hold Back The Rain
6. New Religion
7. Last Chance On The Stairway
8. Save A Prayer
9. Chauffeur

I have lost track of how many times I have said this on this blog, but once again, I am on the verge of nervous breakdown for how much I have to get done.  So, naturally, I am prioritizing this blog over my other assignments, because sanity is a fleeting thing.

How can this music not make you happy?  It was nice to hear something relatively upbeat for once; I feel like the recent goal of these albums have been to make me have a breakdown (as though I need any nudging).  The best songs on this album are the ones that everyone knows, but the entire album is extremely fun.

So a nice break from heavy metal.  Back to reality...

RATING: 4/5

513. Number of the Beast

Number of the Beast
Iron Maiden
1982

Tracks
1. Invaders
2. Children Of The Damned
3. Prisoner
4. 22 Acacia Avenue
5. The Number Of The Beast
6. Run To The Hills
7. Gangland
8. Total Eclipse
9. Hallowed Be Thy Name

I am changing my icon to be a snail, as I feel like it really reflects my pace through this project.  I apologize for only averaging one album a week.  I am hoping I can increase my pace this summer (maybe to one a day even, although my eyes might be bigger than my stomach...ears).  Truth be told, the List has not been offering the strongest motivations lately (excepting Nebraska of course).

Oh, heavy metal.  I am a heavy metal racist; I can't seem to tell the different bands and albums apart.  Some I don't mind as much as others, although I think that reflects more the type of mood I am in than the quality of the music.  There's nothing distinctly intellectual in my distaste for this genre; viscerally, I just don't like it.  If you do, I envy you, as this List is probably a lot easier to get through.

Up next: Duran Duran!  This might out-eighties anything we have seen so far.

RATING: 2/5

512. Sulk

Sulk
Associates
1982

Tracks
1. Arrogance Gave Him Up
2. No
3. Bap De La Bap
4. Gloomy Sunday
5. Nude Spoons
6. Skipping
7. It's Better This Way
8. Party Fears Two
9. Club Country
10. nothinginsomethingparticular

After the greatness that was Nebraska, we get kind of a meh album here.  It wasn't particularly bad, it just didn't really seem remarkable in any way.  It seems so non descript compared to the other albums on this list; I am curious why it was included.

That said, after the recent string of terrible albums, "not bad" is actually refreshing.  It was music I could write to without getting overly distracted, so there is some value in that.  I could clearly see some of the influences behind the album (Bowie perhaps?), but unfortunately, it didn't have a distinct voice of its own.

Apparently, the band would urinate in their guitars while they were recording this.  Artists are such sensitive souls.

RATING: 3/5

511. Nebraska

Nebraska
Bruce Springsteen
1982

Tracks
1. Nebraska
2. Atlantic City
3. Mansion On The Hill
4. Johnny 99
5. Highway Patrolman
6. State Trooper
7. Used Cars
8. Open All Night
9. My Father's House
10. Reason To Believe

I listened to this album a little while ago, but I have had so many writing projects that I am falling behind.  Any further discussion on my current workload will lead to tears, so let's just move onto Nebraska.

Finally, we reached the end of our horrible streak of albums.  I didn't think I would connect to this, as my understanding of Bruce Springsteen was that he was the working man's hero.  Fortunately, this was just beautiful.  It was so simple; just his vocals, a guitar, and a harmonica (that made not be correct but that's what I heard).  You could really just focus on the lyrical quality of the songs, which was excellent.  Who knew Bruce Springsteen was such a poet?  Everyone, you say?

Highly recommended.

RATING: 5/5

510. Black Metal

Black Metal
Venom
1982

Tracks
1. Black Metal
2. To Hell and Back
3. Buried Alive
4. Raise the Dead
5. Teacher's Pet
6. Leave Me in Hell
7. Sacrifice
8. Heaven's on Fire
9. Countess Bathory
10. Don't Burn the Witch
11. At War with Satan

After writing a rant on my book blog and a rant on my movie blog, I thought I would complete the hate tour and complain about this album.  We are really in a bad rut with albums lately.  I hope Bruce Springsteen can save us.

So this is a shitty album, but unlike most of the shitty albums on this List, I understand why it is on here.  It's influential to a genre that I don't particularly enjoy, so I was never going to celebrate it.  Still, I thought I would find at least a little merit in this.  No such luck.  The lyrics are terrible, the songs are repetitive, and the vocalist has so absolutely no range.

Did I mention I hate this?

RATING: 1/5

509. Junkyard

Junkyard
Birthday Party
1982

Tracks
1. Blast Off 
2. She's Hit 
3. Dead Joe 
4. The Dim Locator
5. Hamlet (Pow, Pow, Pow)
6. Several Sins 
7. Big-Jesus-Trash-Can 
8. Kiss Me Black 
9. 6" Gold Blade 
10. Kewpie Doll 
11. Junkyard

I really thought that after "Thriller" I would be accepting of anything.  Well, once again, the List proved me wrong.  These are dark times, and I don't think the next album will likely improve the situation.

Well, we can tell from the cover art that I am not the target demographic for this album.  I am not sure who is...angry teenage boys perhaps.  This was just unpleasant to listen to.  I'm not saying every album has to be Duran Duran-level upbeat but it was moody without much substance, at least to me.  It might appeal to some people, but I hope we can at least agree that this album is probably only accessible to a small group of people.

I miss "Thriller."

RATING: 2/5

508. Thriller

Thriller
Michael Jackson
1982

Tracks
1. Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'
2. Baby Be Mine
3. Girl Is Mine
4. Thriller
5. Beat It
6. Billie Jean
7. Human Nature
8. PYT (Pretty Young Thing)
9. Lady In My Life

With so many obscure albums on The List, we finally reach one that everyone has heard of.  And it's a lot worse than the obscure albums.

I just read that this is the best selling album of all time, which is definitely surprising.  I am not saying there are no good songs.  I've always like "Human Nature" and well...that's about it for this album.  "PYT" just creeps me out in hindsight,  "Thriller" is cheesy as fuck (although I am sure some would argue that's what is fun about it), and I find "Billie Jean" to be...upsetting.  

I know a lot of my Michael Jackson related revulsion comes from what came out in later years.  But even disregarding that, the childlike voice is creepy.  Definitely skippable.

RATING: 2/5

507. Rip It Up

Rip It Up
Orange Juice
1982

Tracks
1. Rip It Up
2. Mud In Your Eye
3. Breakfast Time
4. Flesh Of My Flesh
5. Hokoyo
6. Million Pleading Faces
7. Turn Away
8. I Can't Help Myself
9. Louise Louise
10. Tenterhooks

Why do I keep listening to the rereleases of these albums?  It's always worse than the original.  It's like movie reboots and sequels.  Why can't they leave well enough alone?  Instead they had to include this extra strange track where the band jokes about touching kids?  Considering the next album on this List, this might be a case of ominous foreshadowing.

Other than that, this was a perfectly respectable album.  Perhaps a little generic and forgettable, but enjoyable nonetheless.  With some notable exceptions, there haven't been a lot of risk taking albums lately.  Child molestation references outside.

Still worth listening to, but don't expect to be wowed.

RATING: 3/5